Category: Kids

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“The pumpkins are funny. You, you aren’t that funny.”

My six-year-old’s latest passion is telling me I’m “not that funny.”

Kayla has invented a “Funny Meter’ and tells me daily that I’m “only half-way there,” while she and Bill are “way at the top of the Funny Meter.”

Given that I like to inject humor into much of my writing, my ego could get a rather big bruising here, but I love this little game we’re playing too much to honestly let it bother me.

I find myself making more jokes when she’s nearby, trying to inch my way up the Funny Meter. Yesterday, I got her laughing about our rotting pumpkins. I even resorted to some potty humor. Kids love that stuff.

“That one out there in the garden? The one that’s frowning? He’s saying ‘There’s frost on my bum! Get me outta here! I didn’t sign up for this!”

Kayla started to giggle.

“Hey! You’re laughing!” I said. “I’m funny!”

“No,” she retorted. “The pumpkins are funny. You, you aren’t that funny.”

And with that, she was off on her school bus, and I was left walking home, laughing at what had just transpired; wondering how to make my kid laugh at my jokes again before she hits Tweenhood and finds me not only not-funny but also not-cool.

This morning, I got her laughing by verbally creating an alternate ending to something on TV. But this kid is always one step ahead of me.

“Hey! You’re laughing! I’m funny! I’m funny,” I said, laughing at myself, and the desperation in my tone.

“Oh, no.” said my stubborn child, her face frozen, expressionless. “No, you aren’t.”

“My mouth was laughing, but my mind didn’t find you that funny.”

I hope she’s a little easier on me when she’s all grown up and attending Law school. Somehow, I doubt it. That’s okay. I’m happy just being her Mom; happy to stay smack in the mediocre-middle of the Funny Meter.

I just hope those pumpkins don’t move up any higher.

Funny Pumpkins, copyright Heather Grace Stewart, 2011
'My mouth was laughing...but...." copyright Heather Grace Stewart
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“The Groovy Granny” is “a winner”

Review by Nate Hendley, author of ‘Motivation’ and 9 other books, http://www.natehendley.com/

This hardcover book features a delightful collaboration between mother and daughter (one Kayla Mae Stewart, five-years-old at the time of publication). Mom provides the poetry while Kayla’s vivid drawings illustrate the text. Don’t let the earnestly colourful pictures fool you; while the book exudes youthful exuberance, the poems are anything but childish. Poetess Heather Grace Stewart is a combination wit, raconteur and off-beat sage with a sharp eye for the kind of details that kids and adults alike can love (a “Groovy Granny” demands a 15-scoop ice cream cone; the contents of a lunch-box have a dance party; a messy sibling is accidentally washed at a laundromat, etc). A strong combination of humour and poignancy makes this tome a winner.

The Groovy Granny -poems for kids 4 to 104
by Heather Grace Stewart
ISBN 978-0-9869458-0-9
hardcover ISBN 978-0-9869458-1-6
Available online here: http://www.blurb.com/bookstore/detail/2156713
Copies signed by the author and illustrator: contact writer@hgrace.com

Kayla Stewart, illustrator, signing books- copyright HGS 2011
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The Groovy Granny: ‘Destined to become a family heirloom’

What readers are saying about The Groovy Granny:

“Destined to become a family heirloom.”

“The opening poem, ‘Gadget Snow Pants,’  is pure genius.”

“I can’t wait to read it to my  grandkids and tell them that a special little girl drew all of these amazing pictures. They are going to LOVE it!

“Priceless!”

“Echoes of Seuss, but the humor is all Heather Grace Stewart.”

Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts on ‘The Groovy Granny,’ on Twitter, my Facebook page, and in the comments section at the link above.

Sales in the first three weeks went so well I decided to add the ISBN at the back (this is an important code to make cataloguing the book easier), and added some  reader reviews to the new dust jacket. All three books are available here: http://www.blurb.com/user/store/HeatherGS   Please share this link with others –grandparents, teachers and parents –who might be interested in “The Groovy Granny.”

Signed copies are also available via Paypal, just email me at writer@hgrace.com to make arrangements.

Thanks for reading and sharing!

Heather & Kayla

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A Children’s Poetry Place

I started A Children’s Poetry Place a few months back, but haven’t been able to devote as much time to it as Where the Butterflies Go. Watch for more children’s poetry there in 2011. You can subscribe to the feed, or even follow the blog on Networked Blogs.

To end the year in style there, here are some  Haiku.  Don’t miss the delightful Murkles either. Thanks for reading!  If you can, please let others know about this new blog, and of course, spend some time there with your children.

Thanks so much for visiting from all over the world, for your comments, and for your friendships. Let’s keep our love of poetry alive & well in 2011 and beyond.

Happy Holidays,

Heather

Santa, Please Stop Here!
'Santa, Please Stop Here' by Heather Grace Stewart
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Beyond the Picket Fence: Special Three-Frame Strip